?

I don't even know where to start.
I just feel ... so lost.
I feel like all I'm doing is thinking, thinking, thinking, but I can't remember what I've spent today thinking about. Does that even make sense? I keep losing time.
God, I don't know.
I ended up getting about 3 hours sleep, which is better than nothing. Then I sort of dozed on-and-off while i was on the couch for a while.
The thought of leaving the house gives me a panic attack. I went to get the Saturday Addy before, and it took me almost 3 hours to leave the house. I just couldn't calm down, the thought of walking out the front door was freaking me out totally, and I don't know why. A 10 minute walk, and I was so freaked out.
My head is aching. I'm trying to put full sentences together, and I'm struggling. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me.
I feel like everything has fallen in a heap, including me. I don't see a way up. I don't even know if I want to get up.