Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Jury Duty, Day One/Final Day ... And other random stuff.

Yup. Day one of jury duty was also my final day! :o) *lol* I was reading the info sheet that I got with my jury summons, and something occurred to me. I'd answered one of the questions, and realised I'd answered wrong. The right answer actually made me ineligible for jury service. So I trundled off to the court this morning, and my morning went something like this:

10:15 - Arrive at the court, wait on the steps with about 50 other people. It's raining and cold.

10:25 - The Jury Pool Supervisor comes to get us all, in a loooong line we climb three flights of stairs and get squashed into a room that would be better suited for about 30 people.

10:30 - Jury Pool Supervisor (JPS) reads out all our names to make sure we're all accounted for. Only one person (Arthur Feemble) has not arrived.

10:30 - 10:45 - JPS asks if anyone wishes to change their occupation on the official sheet, and has to ask all those retired people what their occupation was before they retired. While she is doing this, we hear what we assume is a car alarm going off.

10:45 - Alarm is still going. JPS goes to investigate. Comes back to tell us that it is in fact the courts fire alarm, and we all have to evacuate. So we all go back down three flights of stairs, into the cold and the rain, running into the firemen on our way down. I pull the JPS aside to ask if I can still serve - she isn't sure.

10:55 - Alarm is deemed to be false. Once again, it's back up the stairs.

11:00 - Everyone's back in the room. It's time to discuss travel allowence for those who live more than 8km from the court, as they get 30 cents for every kilometre they travel one way (or something ... ?!) JPS puts on a video for us to watch while she goes to talk to the judge.

11:35 - JPS comes back and (thank god!) turns off the video (which isn't finished, but I guess she'd figured they'd tortured us for long enough). Announces that we will be going into court shortly. JPS pulls me aside and tells me that I can go home - I am ineligible to serve on the jury. Woo hoo!

So that was my very exciting day in court ... *lol*


This afternoon when I got home, I made lunch and then decided to laze about on the couch for a while. I ended up falling asleep. I had a really weird dream - I dreamt about Mel. I dreamt of the last time I saw her - three days before she died. In real life, I was walking to work, and she drove past me. She stopped, and I told her I couldn't stop because I was on my way to work, I was in a hurry. I told her that I'd see her when she got back - not knowing that I would never get the chance. In my dream, I stopped. I told her not to go. I told her to take someone else with her. I begged her not to drive when she was tired. I told her not to be an idiot, not to hurry. It's weird. I used to dream of her often when she first died. I would have dreams when I would tell her not to take him, not to drive, or let him drive when she was tired. I would yell at her, telling her she had to be careful. But I haven't had a dream like that in ages.

About 30 minutes ago, I went and sat on my back step to have a smoke. I had my MP3 player going. One of the songs that was played at Mel's funeral was Uncle Krackers "Follow Me". About 3 months before Mel died, I was in Melbourne. I'd spent the week staying with my cousin. I got on the train on the Sunday night. School went back the next day. I was in year 12, and we had set texts for English. I'd taken one of the books that we were meant to read over the holidays with me to Melbourne, but I hadn't even looked at it. I got on the train with a plan - a plan to read the entire way from Melbourne to Kerang. The train was packed, so I found my seat and opened up the book (It was boring as all hell!). I barely noticed when someone sat across from me. As the train pulled away from the station, i looked up to see the city. It was then I noticed the girl who had sat across from me.
It was Mel.
I hadn't seen her in months, and there she was, sitting there grinning at me, like the bloody cheeky thing she was! When it finally clicked (I sat there staring for about 15 seconds) she cracked up laughing!
I turned off the CD walkman I was listening to, and Mel asked what CD was in there. It was Uncle Kracker. My cousin and I had spent literally all day Saturday trying to find the "Follow Me" single. We went to three different shopping centres, and well over a dozen music stores. Everyone had sold out. We'd finally managed to find two copies at Knox. We talked about that for a while, Mel saying she loved the song. Then we talked about everything else, somehow making the 3 and a half hour trip disappear. Needless to say, when we got to Kerang, I'd not read any of the book, my plan had somehow gotten lost.

Anyway, when I went out for my smoke before, just as I sat down, "Follow Me" started playing.

I don't know whether I believe in 'signs'. I know a lot of people do, they believe things they see, or things that happen to them, are because of people who they have loved and lost making their presence known. I guess it's always seemed to me like those people were so desparately clutching at anything, something, in their grief. Whatever helps, right? Whatever makes the grief easier to deal with? And who would judge? You may not believe, but you don't judge. You don't think it's stupid, or ridiculous, you just don't believe.

Now the whole dream & song playing just as I sit down doesn't bother me. Maybe it was a sign? I often hear that song, or one of the other songs played at Mel's funeral, on the radio, or on a CD. It will often make me smile. Once upon a time, when the grief was raw, when I tried to deny what happened, I could cry everytime I heard one of the songs. But now, I smile. Think of that wicked sense of humour, that infectious smile. I think of Mel. The gorgeous person she was.

It's been raining pretty much all day here. While I was having my smoke, I looked up. The sky had turned a reddy/pink colour, and the sun was peaking through. For some reason, something in my mind just *screamed* MEL! It was pretty bizzare.

Do you think it was a sign? Someone trying to make her presence felt? Or was it just a few coincidences, thrown together, that didn't mean anything?


Ok, I'm out ... Thanks for sticking with me while I rambled on! What a nice long entry that was.
Peace, love and laughter!

No comments: